Your First Rhino Rodeo; Ray of Light by Brad Rose

Your First Rhino Rodeo

Sure, the horns. Of course, the horns. But no one expects, the deep baritone whispers, the thoughtful, oh so tender, caresses, the gentle bath of dust. Not to mention the generous girth of those pudgy love handles. And what about those glorious eyes. My goodness, those lavish, loving eyes. There’s nothing on earth quite like them. So do it now. Get off your high horse. Just this, once. Live a little. Climb aboard. Giddy-up.

Ray of Light

I’m not just a spectator. I’m a factory authorized paper pusher. Last night, I was listening to my inner voicemail and a little bit of late-night jackhammering. It was cinematic. Believe me, concrete rhythm instruments aren’t for the faint of heart. After my stint in the animal circus, is it any wonder why they promoted me to Assistant Ring Leader? Of course, while devouring a Zebra, a tiger can’t help having its stripes and eating them too, but then, who doesn’t like snacks? I don’t want to get all New Agey on you, but during my cognitive sabbatical, I looked into the abyss, and wouldn’t you know it; it’s nothingness all the way down, so I started dancing in my underwear. Like Tom Cruise, even in your worst nightmare, I’m an irrepressible ray of light.